My thoughts before November 4, 2008

June 16, 2008

Dear friends,

I know I have been very silent on the issue, I want to make sure everyone knows that I will be getting married in the next few weeks. My partner announced this on her blog the other day, so I thought I would give you all a heads-up to what the plans are.

We will be getting our marriage license on the 19th (hopefully) and are trying to plan our civil ceremony for June 27th. At that point, we would be married in the courts. We are trying to do this before the November election, as the people of California are not the most predictable in regard to voting for this issue. Our marriage ceremony would be on June 27th, 2009, so we can do this whole thing in grand style...with beer, wine, bands, and much expected Hoopla! It seems, instead of eloping, we are not making it much of a surprise.

In the past, California has voted to make marriage between a man and a woman. I don't believe this was a "constitutional amendment" switch, but I do know it was overturned by the court this past month. A lot of people don't really know what will happen to the people married before November, but I would rather have the possible security of "real" marriage for just a little while. If, by doing this, we can change the mind of one voter, we are all set to go. This is a very political move for me. One that I am not used to. I am really not that political, I don't think. I just try to be as open as possible about my life and help students achieve success over their lifetime. If that's political, than chalk this up to one more notch on my belt.

My partner is one of the best things to ever happen to me. I have calmed down considerably and appreciate the struggles and happiness behind trying to achieve balance among two individuals and a furry little creature (our dog buddy). I have been challenged in my independence and how I handle things. I have also been challenged on patience and perseverance. They are all good challenges that make me a better person. I lead a pretty damn good life. To say that my life is separate but equal is quite a different perception than I have ever had.

So, the plan is to get married while we are home, sans rings and all other stuff we are saving for 2009. We will keep people posted who want to be a part of it (civil ceremony) while we are home. Then, plan for the 2009 wedding in the backyard of either our house or my parent's house.

If our marriage gets overturned, I will deal with it. We will deal with it. We are ready for whatever may come. We will be sad, but we have been sad before. We will overcome. What we know is that we both want kids. We want those kids and ourselves to be protected. We also want people to know how much this means to us, as we are moving it up much quicker and changing the course of our previously "planned" wedding. We are willing to do this because we hope we might be a part of the movement. We hope we might be able to be one of the couples who is able to stay married. We hope we will be able to make a difference in our lives and in our future lives. Since we believe marriage officially happens in the court and the ceremony is a completely different celebration, we are making the commitment early.

Please get the word out to vote this election. I will be voting in the November election. My parents will be voting in the election. This is a serious time with serious ramifications. A yes or a no changes lives. One stands for equality for all. One stands for discrimination and separation. Does this remind anyone of anything? This has nothing to do with the "sanctity" of marriage. This has to do with not accepting my life. But, this really has to do with equal rights under the law. Hell, with the way the world has been, I am surprised gay people even have the right to vote.
There are still people who believe gay people need exorcisms (we are being taken by the devil), shock therapy, counseling, and other forms of torture to get over "this thing". They still believe I am choosing this "lifestyle". Crazy, huh?

Anyway, back to happy and not morbid. We are getting HITCHED!! Enough said!

Love,

Stacy